Tuesday, February 21, 2012


This was the day I got my first BFP with Bea.   I didn't think I was pregnant and it was such a shock.

I knew I wasn't pregnant this time.  It was a bad day when I came to that conclusion.  I don't want to have to do this again.  But i will.   I'll do it over and over and over.  I always wanted many kids.  3 - 4 -5.  Please don't let IF keep me at one.  Yes one super, amazing, perfect kid that I am endlessly grateful for.  But I want to get to choose my family.  And my family has always been kidS.

Why did I come to that conclusion?  I have had ZERO symptoms.   Certainly not that "feels like AF is coming" cramps that all the girls with BFPs ask the boards about roughly 3dp5dt.

Instead on my 3dp5dt I woke up feeling fantastic.  No cramps.  No low energy.  No change of appetite.  I felt so good I could conquer the world.  Which was horrible news.  No symptoms.

Well not no symptoms.  I was taking naps in the middle of the day, but that could be chalked up to the fact that I could (still milking the taking it easy thing).

I had horrible night sweats on night 2dp5dt.  And I've had some vivid dreams.  In fact I even had a dream I had a son and showed my mom a positive pregnancy test.

So I took that as a sign to test on 4dp5dt.   FMU.   Negative.  Not really a shock.  I mean it's super early.  And I was clearly not pregnant.

That evening I got a special delivery from Amazon.  A ton of cheapie pregnancy tests.  So I had to use them, right?

Imagine my surprise when I saw this.....

night of 4dp5dt

My husband saw it too.  He's usually the one telling me I'm crazy.  So then the freak out begins.  I'm pretty sure my trigger is long gone.  I mean that was 11 days ago.  My triggers never stay around for long.

Just for a second thinking I could be pregnant brought on a bunch of symptoms.  The (small) crampies.  The tuggies.  I'm very bloated and can't suck my stomach in at all.  I'm tired.  Not just nap tired.  Like I can't do much activity tired.

So this morning of 5dp5dt I tested again.  The line was still there.  Maybe a little darker.  Maybe a little lighter.  Not sure.  But there.   I know my FMU is never as...potent?....as later in the day so I figured I'd wait to this evening to test again.

Easy to keep away from the pee sticks since I was in jury duty (managed to read all 374 pages of Huger Games as I waited).

I came home and peed.   Look for yourself.

I'd say that's pretty clear.   I'm going to call the doctor tomorrow and see if I can get in for a Beta.  If not I have a progesterone and estrogen check on Thursday and they better put a beta in there too.

That line is a lot darker than Bea's line on the same day.  Hopefully we'll see a strong beta.  (stronger than Bea's 17).   My husband thinks it's twins.

One.  Two.  Four.  I don't care.  Just let my family feel complete.


  1. those tests look legit! Game on!

  2. Congrats! I'm 5dp5dt from my second FET. I find it so inspiring to read positive stories from people like you. Got my first BFP today. Now just praying it sticks!